CelesteAustin, Author at Better Than Newlyweds

WORDS BREED WORDS

December 30, 2013 by CelesteAustin

Hello ladies, sorry it took me so long to share again. We all know life gets tough around the holidays but also unfortunately our laptop got stolen so my typing was restricted temporarily. Thanks to my wonderful husband and Christmas blesssings I am back on the keyboard again. This last five months have been a powerful transtion for me. God never ceases to teach us new things if we allow him to. I was doing my devotions one day and ran across a wonderful encouragment. It was a challenge, https://www.reviveourhearts.com/articles/30-day-husband-encouragement-challenge/.

When I first read through it I thought, oh how nice for somene. I immediately began to hear God tug on my heart. You see, like many of us do, I had been complaining to God and asking him to help my husband. He is more thoughtful than most and a great husband but we had been at odds about an important decision and that had brought distance between us. I had been longing to hear key encouraging words. I had been praying that God would give me grace for him and give him wisdom to say the words I needed to hear. What I was not considering is my words to him. I was not saying negative things necessarily. I have learned to guard my mouth against that but my silence left a huge gap. He knows me well enough to know when I am staying quiet and I definitely wasn’t encouraging him like I needed to .

So while I asked God to show him I needed his loving encouragment, God saw that Wade needed my words desperately too. I started the challenge a little cautiously and honestly not entirely optimisically. OK God, I’ll give it a try. Right off the bat I noticed that each day God would give me the perfect set up to say the encouraging word that I had prayed to give that day. HE didn’t respond in any extreme way at first but gradually I noticed his attitude lighten and his face would change. HIs love tank was getting fuller, he was feeling encouraged. There were some days where I would read the challenge in the morning and think, oh God I am not sure I can say that honestly or keep my tongue from negative words if this or if that… God was not worried and day after day he gave me the strength and the joy that comes from obeying. It got to the point where I was looking forward to my encouragement moment each day, even getting giddy about it.

The most striking moment was the day when my hubby pulled me aside and began to say the exact words I had been begging God to hear five months before. My heart lept, my love tank swelled and I was overwhelmed by the Joy I felt. God was answering my prayers AS I put my hubby first and obeyed my father who knew just what both of us needed. IF I can encourage you today to try this challenge I know that it will bless your marriage, whether it is words that you are longing to hear or a big decision you wish you could get on page about . Whether it is a negative spirit in your home that you are trying to get past or a simple feeling of apathy you want to rid your marriage of, this challenge will totally Revive and Bless your marriage if you trust that God will use your obedience to bless your marriage. WE can only change ourselves, but words are breeding words in your life, are you reproducing truth or lies? Are you breeding trust or hurt, love or negative thoughts. God Bless you as you take this on, please share the testimonies after you do. God is so Good! I love how he’s keeping us honeymooners for life:) Almost nine years and I love him more everyday! Celeste

Our Story, the Austin’s!

May 2, 2013 by CelesteAustin

OUR STORY

IF YOU LOOK AT THE BEGINNING OF SOMETHING IT HELPS YOU INDERSTAND THE REST.

I love our story. Funny to think about how many times Wade and I could have met or should have. I went to NAU for college and Wade went to Embry Riddle in Prescott, before transferring to NAU. He is was involved in Chi Alpha Christian Ministries and so was I. WE both attended the retreats in Prescott every year. WE never met. God kept us apart until we were ready.

In the fall of 2003 I moved back to Flagstaff AZ. I had been in Louisiana for two years doing an internship for campus ministry and was so excited to be back among my beloved pine trees. I’ll never forget it, I was so elated to finally be on staff at my favorite campus in my favorite town. I had arrived! We were helping the students move in to the dorms on welcome week and taking staff pictures. Kelly, Ryan and I were having a blast getting resettled in my old roots. WE happened to be near the Mt View dorms and they offered to introduce me to the famed pianist Wade Austin. I had heard about him from some friends while I was in Louisiana and although they had mentioned he would be perfect for me, I wasn’t looking for a serious attachment just yet.

He walked down the dorm steps in a dress shirt, dress pants and his socks. I had to smile at the mix of formal and casual he carried off with ease. It wasn’t this ‘love at first sight’ that some people talk about but he seemed nice and cute, and I was definitely interested in getting to know him better.

The next few weeks we got to know each other as friends and fellow musicians on the worship team. I loved singing as he played, he was so quick to learn everything and extremely talented, but nothing romantic yet.

Our added hesitation to think anything could happen came from the fact that I was XA staff and he was a student. IT was a “NO, NO” to date students. Wade didn’t seem to be worried about that at all, but I was eager to make a good impression and very concerned about breaking any rules.

AS things do, it changed on a dime. I was walking across campus when suddenly it began pouring down rain. I was prepared for once and yanked out my big southern umbrella. Just then I saw him rushing across the side walk drenched in rain. I giggled to myself and shouted out, “Want to share my umbrella?” He agreed and little did we know that was the beginning of forever. That afternoon we sat in the Union and hours passed in a blink talking and laughing, over the next several weeks it seemed like I would run into him everywhere. He would offer to buy me a Starbucks, my weakness, I would agree to sit and talk for a few minutes and minutes easily turned into hours. We talked about everything, laughed and without realizing it began to fall for each other.

It was tough because I knew I couldn’t date him. I told him that and he agreed to “wait for me.” It would be at least two more years before he would graduate, I was ‘robbing the cradle’, he was four years younger than me. I talked to my campus pastors about it and they said, “NO dating students!” I tried but the harder we tried to stay friends the more in love we fell. I had to confess to Ryan and Kelly that I let him kiss me, I felt so stupid saying the dreaded words, “It just happened.” They were worried about us making a bad impression on the students but agreed there was a real connection there. One night he invited me to the music building to hear a song he had written. I listened and I just knew that he had written it for me. He literally played my heart on the piano,it was a dream come true. Without words he was able to express his feelings through music, it moved me more than anything, Ever! That night I wrote in my journal, “Oh no, I am falling for him, I am in Love !!!”

When I told my campus pastors, he was the one,that I was going to marry him they had to let God’s plan take its course. The next two years we were friends with intentions and the tension built and built, until we were able to get engaged and announce our love to the group. Everyone was so shocked that we were in love although it cracked us up because we couldn’t imagine it not being so obvious. Wade graduated and one week later May 21^st 2005 we were married. Our journey has been one full of adventure and love. I wouldn’t change one sentence of our amazing story. It has been tough and challenging sometimes as all good marriages are, but I never doubt that God has blessed me with this wonderful man. He called us to be lifelong friends and lovers.

Almost Eight years later and Just the Beginning

Celeste

Recapturing ME!

May 2, 2013 by CelesteAustin

Ever noticed that the further into something you get, the harder it is to remember where you started?
I think about a walk in the forest. If you are really into it, you are looking at the pine trees and enjoying the butterflies, breathing in the fresh pine air and just well, taking it all in. After an hour or two you begin to forget how you got there in the first place, especially if you are riding a mountain bike and going a distance, which I love to do. Life is like that, and marriage too. I had a painful epiphany this last week, painful but productive. I realized that I am starting to forget my roots. Where we started as a couple, the Me I was when I first met Wade and the US we were.
It all started as I began to unpack our belongings that were in storage while we were in China for two years. It has taken us this long to really get all our things back into the same house again. Resettling after being out of the country for several years takes so much longer than you think it will, like so many other transitions we go through in life.
So I started unpacking and caught myself smiling from ear to ear when I realized how much of ‘my stuff’ I forgot about. I was especially moved by my artsy stuff and my planting stuff, the things that show my creative side. It made me smile but it also made me a little sad. When is the last time I sat down and just created something out of pure enjoyment, no assignment or lesson involved? It had been a while.
God always confirms it several different ways when he is trying to change something in us. So my husband and I were talking and he said, “Baby, I just want to see you so happy, like when we first met.” The only time he saw that girl is the times when we first found out we were pregnant. Then those four times we lost our baby to miscarriage he saw it leave again. He was trying to express to me how much he wanted to see me glow from the inside like I did when he first met me out of pure joy of life and love.
I realized that I have started to lose that person a little at a time. She became so focused on figuring out how to get the dream here, that she lost ME. WE became disjointed, the goal oriented one and the happy carefree one. Wade missed our roots, and I did too but I didn’t even realize it till the reminder happened. I was so focused on the goal… the destination that I had lost my enjoyment in the moments of the journey. That is not the real me, and Wade missed me.
Sure we will change over time, we will grow and transition, but we need desperately to hold on to that person God created us to be and the one our husbands fell in love with in the first place.
For me the change started with the loss of my pregnancies and the dream unfulfilled. For you it may be the opposite, it may be having kids and focusing on them has made you forget to be the carefree kid he met.
Maybe it is the stress of your job or just the disillusionment you have faced in marriage or aging.
Whatever it is, we don’t have to lose ourselves. We don’t have to lose the reason he saw us and was captured by us in the first place. He most likely won’t express that to you in words but he may be missing you. You may be missing you too!
So how do we recapture “that” us? Well, by going back and giving ourselves the time we used to, to just enjoy life. I made a promise to myself this week to belly laugh whenever I get the chance. To use my pastels this week, to plant something in my pretty pots and, to just breath life in. I don’t have to wait until my mountain has been moved to enjoy the view.
“I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea, and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.” Mk 11:23
That is good and it is true but while we’re believing that God will do that miracle for us, we can’t lose ourselves.
While we wait for our destination, we can’t let ourselves miss the journey. Or lose ourselves to the waiting.
My wonderful mother in law gave me this placard when we went to China it said “the journey IS the Destination!” I have to remind myself of that truth every day, this life is passing us by so quickly and we have to enjoy every moment of our marriage. Enjoy him, and BE you. That is what God has for us if we let Him. Sometimes I am the real Mountain that needs to be moved. Get out of God’s way and let him bless you now, instead of losing yourself to waiting.
Also who better to remind us of the US we were created to be than the one who knows us best. “O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my every thought when far away. You chart the path ahead of me and tell me where to stop and rest. Every moment you know where I am. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, LORD.” (Psalm 139:1-4 NLT) I have also promised myself to allow God to remind me weekly who I am. To spend time just smiling and enjoying the story that He is writing in my life, to look forward to JER 29:11, the plans he has for me, without missing out on today! Join me in my journey of recapturing myself and just see if it won’t bless him and spice up your marriage this week.

Love Celeste

INFERTILITY

March 3, 2013 by CelesteAustin

INFERTILITY.. BARRENNESS.. CHILDLESSNESS, TO SOME JUST WORDS, TO OTHERS A SIMPLE DIAGNOSIS, BUT TO US THE WORDS LEAVE A GRIMACE ON OUR FACES AND A DEEP, DEEP, ACHE IN OUR SOULS. RATHER THAN BE SILENT, I HAVE FINALLY DECIDED TO TAKE EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO TURN THAT PAIN INTO A VOICE OF HOPE AND RELATING. THAT IF NOTHING ELSE, MIGHT GIVE SOMEONE OUT THERE A LITTLE COMFORT.
My name is Celeste LaDele Austin. I always dreamed of being a mom. Actually I never really “dreamed” even. Mostly, just assumed that I would be. Then when I met the man of my dreams and got married it made that wish even more tangible. After four miscarriages and seemingly a million tests I am in a totally new place about the whole subject. I still believe that God will give me and my wonderful husband a family one day, but for now I am stuck in the zone of hoping and waiting for that miracle to come true. The doctors can’t seem to answer the only question I hear daily and that is ‘why not me’? They don’t know the reason and they don’t have a solution but HE the master of my universe, and the author of this story, has my answers.Sounds trite, but it’s true. In the meantime, God has given me some hope through this message I am about to share with you and I hope it helps you too.

Isaiah 54:1-5 “Sing, barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband, says the LORD.

2 “Enlarge the place of your tent, stretch your tent curtains wide,
do not hold back; lengthen your cords, strengthen your stakes.3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
your descendants will dispossess nations and settle in their desolate cities.4 “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.5 For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name— the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.”
I was praying one day and really complaining to God that there just aren’t enough passages in the bible about this issue, at least not encouraging ones. And in my opinion, none on the topic of miscarriage, and like issues and He led me to this passage. Ever since, I really have felt encouraged by it. Literally it is talking about a nation but I think we can take truth from it and apply it to our situation too.
First it says the word, the dreaded word, “barren”. Then it specifies… “you who never BORE children”. Easy to just read right past that, like yes we know the definition. I think there is more to it than that. The author is drawing our attention to the fact that being in labor and bearing Children is not the only way to become a mother. He then brings our attention back to that fact when he says, “because, more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has children.”
1. THERE ARE BENEFITS:
When I first started going through this battle, I refused to entertain any thoughts about the benefits of NOT having children and would become furious at those who would attempt to encourage me in that way. People say the stupidest things when you are going through this. They mean well but are often unwise in the things that they say. I did not want to hear, “At least you can sleep in.” or “It least you still have a cute belly button”. Sure, it was true but it felt like betrayal of my dream to admit that there were benefits to not having my children.
 Here is the truth, for every ugly, bad thing that we go through God truly does have good things that he brings from and through those things. (Romans 8:28) So it is not wrong of us to see that He does bless this ache and turn this pain to GLORY.
 One of the Glories he brings out of this is a great opportunity. To funnel all that energy, and love, and nurturing that we desperately want to give our children into other people until and if he brings us that genetic child.

 It is true I can do things that I could not do if I had my own children. I can love more people… have more “Children” than those who are raising their own children. That is not a bad thing.
 So children, what do I mean by that? I believe that God has placed people in our lives for us to love and nurture. He calls us to them and we just know they are ours. We can disciple them, we can love them, we can lead them closer to God and encourage them in a way that we never could do if we had a house full.
2. THE ENEMY’S PLAN FOR MY FRUITLESSNESS:
The enemy, the robber of our souls tells us not to give that love away as if we will run out before our children get here. We sometimes funnel so much of our emotional and physical and spiritual energy into getting that baby here when really.. can we? I know for me I had to learn “I AM NOT IN CONTROL!!!” There is nothing that I can do to make this happen for us. If I keep pushing and trying to make it happen I only accomplish the opposite. I drive my husband crazy with worry for me, I tire myself out and stress out and honestly make it that much more likely that I will never be able to get pregnant and carry a healthy baby in that state anyway.
 Instead of listening to the enemy I choose to pour all of that love out to others. I choose to love and nurture those around me and give them all that energy and even share my pain with them because we women of every age need to know that whatever we go through we can thrive and grow and have Joy. That God can bring that person through it so I know that God can bring me through whatever trial I am facing. !!!
 The enemy hates that, he wants us mourning and crying.. which for the record THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH CRYING! You better … otherwise you can’t heal. But we gotta mourn and share, and mourn and share, and love and share and cry and on and on… not lock it all away. We won’t run out of love, God is love and he will give us as much as we pour out. We can’t fill the place the child holds with other people but we can spend our time loving instead of waste all our time simply waiting.
3 ENLARGE YOUR TENT!

“Enlarge the place of your tent, stretch your tent curtains wide,
do not hold back; lengthen your cords, strengthen your stakes.3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;”
 Open up your tent and let more people in. That is why I got involved in this website in the first place. Because I have a passion for seeing people have awesome marriages and because I want to reach out and have as many sisters as God wants to give me. I can learn from your story and you can learn from mine. I can help you not want to quit when you are close to giving up and you can help me! There are people in your life right now that would benefit from your story but you are not sharing it because maybe you were like me. I wanted to wait until I had my happy ending to share my story. I even wrote a book and didn’t publish it because I was waiting for the ending to say and THEN GOD BROUGHT A MIRACLE. I WAS THINKING that was the way to give people hope. But isn’t there more hope in knowing that I can have JOY in the trial that God is giving me peace and even satisfaction in the waiting and he can do that for them too.

 4: NO SHAME!!!
“Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.5 For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name— the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.”
There is so much shame associated with this. We think we are so modern and independent and yet deep down we do not feel like real women unless we can choose to have children and do it well. I have news for you THERE IS NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU!!!! The enemy is such a liar and we feed his lies. We apologize to our families and husbands as if it is something that we have chosen. Some of us think we are being punished for sleeping with someone before marriage, others an abortion, others still take on the shame that it is because of their weight or health… the truth is in most cases it has nothing to do with anything that you are doing. I can tell you I heard that from at least five doctors before I ever thought it could be true. The God of our souls chose us to be his bride and he is in no way ashamed of us and we need to let go of that shame and dance again. WE need to see that God has called us to this for a purpose and start finding out what that is! WE can be FRUITFUL!!! This is my favorite part!!!
5. YOUR DESCENDANTS!!!
“your descendants will dispossess nations and settle in their desolate cities.”
My descendants??? I am barren oh but I do have descendants!!! The people that God has given me who will spread the vision He gave me. Who will reproduce and make me a grandmother, and great grandmother by making babies and teaching them about the Lord and by reproducing in their spiritual lives too. I will have more children in more places than I could ever hope to count all because I opened my life, I shared my pain, and my hope, I gave myself away.
Maybe this answers your questions, maybe not but it sure helped me and I am striving everyday to see myself as fruitful not barren!

Dreams!!!

November 29, 2012 by CelesteAustin

DREAMS
DREAMS, WHO DOESN’T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT THEM RIGHT? WHY IS IT THAT THEY CAN BE THE BIGGEST SOURCE OF JOY IN YOUR MARRIAGE AND AT THE VERY SAME TIME, A POINT OF CONTENTION AND CONFLICT TOO? FUNNY, HOW SOMETHING SO WONDERFUL CAN BE SO HARD TO AGREE ON.
Well before you met that wonderful man or woman you are married to they were a dream too weren’t they? In your heart of hearts you fully expected to meet and marry someone who had the exact same life plan and wishes as you, right? Wrong! You knew deep down that they would have dreams that differ from you, after all you are not going to marry yourself, how boring would that be? LOL!!! Still we imagine that in a perfect marriage we both get all our wishes met and never get in the way of the others ambitions or hopes. Is this even the way God intended a goldly marriage to be? I am writing this because I don’t think he did! Now before we go on I need to say, there is a big difference between dreams and calling. Our calling is given to us from God and that is another subject entirely. Sometimes we need God’s help to distinguish between our dreams and our callings.
So what happens when that prince or princess of yours suddenly has a dream that interferes with your plan? Well, in typical marriages, a war ensues. Both begin to push for their own view of what is important and in the end many either just get bitter or decide to go their own way and the marriage is over.
I think we have many scriptures to help us discover Gods view on the subject.
He said, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” Luke 6:31, right? He also said love your neighbor as you love yourself, Matthew 22:36-40. I don’t know about you but I love my baby much more than my neighbor! So, why can it hurt so much when he wants something that hinders my wants and dreams? It hurts because, I am selfish in my nature and I need God’s help to be like Him and choose others above myself. If I am fighting for my husband’s dreams and he is fighting for my dreams, we are both going to end up being happier in the end. When we do it God’s way, we do not become bitter and angry and apart. We are pulled together by our selflessness and ambition for each other, not apart by our inner drive to have what we want when we want it! It is so much easier said than done friends! I am fighting to learn this in my marriage right now. After eight years of marriage, we have learned a lot about our similarities and differences. Sometimes what he wants doesn’t mesh with what I have planned or am hoping for. There have been times when I really messed it up. I fought hard for what I wanted, and usually got it. I got it at the cost of him feeling plowed over and disrespected and it came back to bite me later. On the other hand, in those times when I put my wishes on the back burner and chose what he needed, God blessed that and made sure I had what I needed too. Also more often than not, my man was so much more willing to fight for what he knew I wanted and I usually ended up with better things when I chose him. When he chooses me and I choose him, not only are we more likely to get what we want, we are drawn together and closer to God.
The thing that usually really distinguishes newlyweds and married folks is the newlyweds can only think about how to make their spouse smile and give them what they want and need. Why does it change? One of us starts it and the other follows suit. We convince ourselves that worldly ideals are true. We say things like, “if I don’t fight for my dreams, no one will!” That may feel true but a marriage that stays “Better than newlyweds” is one where his needs stay in priority and you live, to love, to please him! Let us be the one that chooses to put our spouse above our wants. God will fight for us when we live the way he asks us to. 1 Corinthians 13:4-9 (NIV) “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” The Lord tells us that love is “not self seeking” so I think that answers our question.
So shall we make it practical? Let’s say you have a budget…. Ahh money! One of the things that really stretches us in life. So we have an extra fifty bucks in the budget for whatever. He wants to take a martial arts class and you want to take Zumba…. What do you do? I would love to hear your comments. Let’s hear your experiences on this topic and start a conversation. Thanks for reading . I pray that God gives you the desires of your heart and helps you to love your spouse better and more selflessly than ever before.
Love Celeste

AFFILIATE DISCLOSURE