In tough times choose unity over anger and blame

Unity in marriage is probably one of the best strategies to fireproof your marriage. In the midst of tough times, it becomes easy to get angry with our spouse, jump on the blame wagon or get caught up in the enemy’s attacks.

Of course, the enemy does come to steal, kill and destroy. He is after our families and marriages. However, I would rather focus on keeping a united front with my husband in tough times than give the enemy attention.

Why do I say this? Because one of the best ways to engage in spiritual warfare is to remain in unity with your spouse. Plus, I love being on the receiving end of God’s blessings.

How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!…For there the Lord bestows his blessing, even life forevermore. Psalm 133:1, 3b

This Psalm is one of my favorites. I love the picture the psalmist used to describe unity. It’s part of our worship to the Lord.

This week God really began speaking to me about unity. My hubby and I have been facing a tough financial year. A couple of weeks ago we found out that our finances were back to where they were in March this year. I felt all our efforts had been for naught.

Still, I wasn’t as confronted with the importance of unity until Wednesday night. I was heading for prayer meeting at my church when I got fined by the cops for not renewing my car license (Grrrr). I don’t know who I was angrier at myself, my husband or God.

As I sat watching a testimony being played off YouTube the Lord gently said to me:

Don’t partner with anger or blame; it will break your unity. Keep a united front with Sean.

Immediately, my anger dissolved. Being angry or trying to blame wasn’t going to solve anything. I messaged my hubby and told him that I didn’t want to partner with anger or blame. We are a team and together we will come through our tough times.

Ok. I admit. This week we still had a quarrel so this is a work in progress. That being said, I am aware of unity in our marriage. The more united we are with our spouse, the more our homes are filled with peace, joy, and kindness.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

At the end of the day, speaking to our spouse in anger doesn’t accomplish much. I can’t think of one example in my marriage where anger accomplished anything helpful. No. All anger has done is put a rift between me and my husband. Kindness, gentleness, and genuine encouragement serve to keep our hearts connected to each other.

When we present a united front to the world we enter a “force field” of godly protection. Life and the enemy can shoot darts at us but they merely bounce off hitting the ground ineffective and useless. Hurray.

Our marriages thrive in unity. Fun, flirting and joy echoes through your home causing your children to giggle or shake their ends in amusement at their love struck parents. Secretly, your children’s hearts are warmed at the love and security unity brings to them. Choose today to partner with God and choose unity.