I want to encourage you today to Fight for your Marriage. Stay in. Don’t jump ship. Every marriage relationship will have mountains and valleys.

Every spouse is going to deserve banishment at some point, but if you tough it out together, God will do amazing and remarkable things in your heart and in the heart of your spouse. He will develop such deep roots in your oneness that you won’t see yourself as two individuals anymore.

I sit here with tears in my eyes as I read about the break up of yet another Christian couple. Most people will say, “I’m so glad you’re happy. I’m so glad you’ve found someone who makes you happy.” I cannot. Divorce is the wrong choice. “Moving on” is not the answer. “Feeling happy” is not enough. A family ripped apart permanently causes deep and painful ripples into the future. Followers of Christ, it should not be so among you.

Don’t think I’m piling on. If you are the victim of a spouse who left, I am not judging you. Allow God to heal your heart. It will take time and love and patience. If you are the one who left, there’s still time to repent and rebuild. It’s never too late.

If you are single, or are facing challenges in your marriage, let me encourage you. Never assume a “strong” marriage is perfect, or that those who have one “have never gone through what you have.” I guarantee you that their marriage is strong because they have had to develop strong roots. Roots take pain and labor.

A great, life long marriage is not built on fleeting beauty, short-term feelings or personal achievement. It is built on self-sacrifice, struggles, determination and sweat. An oak tree doesn’t grow from an acorn to a majestic beauty without these qualities. It is a mystery, but God uses pain to make us stronger.

Don’t give up. Don’t give in. Share your pain with your spouse and grow deeper together. You’ll either grow deeper together or you’ll grow apart. Determine, as far as it concerns you, to be there no matter what storms may come.