LORD Archives - Better Than Newlyweds

WHEN THINGS DON’T GO ACCORDING TO PLAN | Stacy Hudson | Better Than Newlyweds

September 19, 2016 by Mrs. Hudson

What do you do when things don’t go according to plan? (According to your plan anyway) Yesterday (Sunday) I sat down to write my blog post for marriage Monday (today) and my website was down. It was an issue with my server and there was nothing I could do. I just had to wait. I’m not the best at waiting. When things don’t go according to plan I usually try to adjust the plan to get things going smoothly again. But that usually does not work either. The only thing that seems to produce is stress. And last time I checked I don’t think that was listed as a Fruit of the Spirit!?

Galatians 5:22-23. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

I am a planner. God knows this. He challenges me in this daily. I am learning that I can’t really make plans if they don’t involve Him. I know that sounds simple but think about it… how often do we make plans throughout the day that don’t involve God? I do this with everything from what to cook for dinner to the more serious stuff like looking for a job. When God is not involved, in even the simple things, life is more complicated. When God is your focus and is at the center of your thoughts… peace flows like a river.

Several times over the past week God has brought the picture of a river to my mind. On my evening walk, at church, and even during a fun night with friends playing Catch Phrase! God wants to be involved in every detail of our lives because He Loves us so much. He absolutely wants to be involved in your marriage. Loving another person like Jesus Loves us is not possible without Jesus. Another thing that sounds so simple but if we are not letting Jesus Love on us every day how can we expect to be able to show Love to our Husbands (wives)?

John 15:12 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.

John 13:15 “For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.

1 John 4:7-21 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

When things don’t go according to plan I get uncomfortable.

The birth of our daughter did not go as planned. Not even close. She was born a month early after I was induced due to high liver enzymes. Basically my liver and the placenta were not getting along. My liver enzyme levels were over 1000 when they should have been in the 40-60 range. We were admitted to the hospital on a Friday afternoon after being called back with the test results from my blood work they had done that morning after my 36 week check up. The call woke me up from a nap. Talk about a “wake up call”. We were in the hospital 6 long days and 5 very uncomfortable nights. Those beds were made for delivering babies and not for sleeping. The bed was not the only uncomfortable thing. Things not going according to plan was uncomfortable too. But God was our comfort.

Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

2 Corinthians 1:3-5 3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.

Psalm 119:50 This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.

While in the Hospital I underwent about 6 or 7 unexplainably painful procedures. I say “about 6 or 7” because I am not sure. Those are the ones I can remember. As I have been attempting to write out my birth story to share here I am learning that I have blocked a lot of it out. It was the most painful week of my life. It was the most unplanned week of my life. It was the most blessed week of my life. It may not have felt that way then and it may have taken me over a year to notice it, but God blessed that week.

During that week I saw my husband Love me and care for me like he never had before. I saw family faces awaken with the joy of a new baby on the horizon. I saw our family step up in ways to help us that I never thought possible. I saw myself hold our new born baby girl after I was in labor for 70 hours and then pushed for 3. It felt like the baby would never come. But God’s timing is perfect and after being in a rotation of on call Doctors, for several days, our doctor was able to deliver our baby. God provided the right Doctors and nurses at the right time for us. God put the right people in the delivery room at the right time. God had people visit, text, and call at the right time. God is so good and so loving.

When we left the hospital with our new sweet teeny tiny bundle of joy I was certain I would never give birth again. The pain of those procedures, the labor, and the delivery had been too much. I was open to adoption but birth… nope. That was my plan, not God’s. No, for those of you jumping to conclusions, I am not pregnant. (haha) I am, however, open to the possibility. If I were pregnant right now I would be ok. If it had happened 6 months ago I would have been freaking out. And I don’t mean in a good way. Just ask any of my “Forever Sisters” that I have studied scripture with and worshiped with over the past 2 years. Their prayers (along with many others) carried me through. They were only able to carry me because I let them in. They have literally seen the fear on my face at the thought of being pregnant again. Now, if that is His plan, I’ll be ok.

I’ve been so worried about having to do it all again when I didn’t even do it the first time. He is the only reason I made it through all of what I went through. He is the reason I am still standing and enjoying motherhood now. God delivered more than a baby the day Sarah was born. We are still harvesting the fruit that was produced during that week in the Hospital. God is not done yet. If that is what happens when things don’t go according to (my) plan… I’m ok with that.

“My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD” (Isaiah 55:8)

“the plans of the LORD stand firm forever” (Psalm 33:11)

“The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps” (Prov. 16:9)

“many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails” (Prov. 19:21)

What do you do when things don’t go according to plan? What do you hope your reaction would be if plans changed? Share below with us about how God showed up when things didn’t go according to plan! According to your plan anyways! 😀 Thanks for reading!

Can we “affair proof” our marriages? | Stacy Hudson | Better Than Newlyweds

September 5, 2016 by Mrs. Hudson

Affairs have ruined too many marriages. When I sit and think about how many people I know who have an affair affect their marriage… I just shake my head. It hurts my heart. I know it hurts God’s heart as well. That is not His plan or design for marriage. Marriage is supposed to be a sacred bond that no one can infiltrate. How does an affair happen? Can we “affair proof” our marriages?

My husband and I have had a conversation about “affair proofing” our marriage. We talked about ways we could protect ourselves from going down that road and eventually falling off the cliff that is surely at the end. One thing we decided was that we always need to be open with each other. This means that our phones, email accounts, and bank accounts are an open book. This is one of the many reasons we have a shared bank account. We are one… and we try to live in a way that keeps us together as much as possible.

My friend Wil Addison (Host of Airing the Addison’s at American Family Association) makes a good point about family and favor from the Lord:

“Men there is safety in family. Family provides joy, stability, true love, accomplishment, wealth and yes freedom. For a man to step out on his wife and abandon his family it’s equivalent to a man having great wealth and riches only to willingly give all of it away to another.

You want favor seek the Lord for a wife.

You desire safety and stability have kids with that wife and love and nurture them.

Two scriptures for your consideration:

Proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.”

Psalm 127:3-5 “Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

When dealing with marital issues that are heavier than usual I like to get advice from friends who have been married longer than us. We have learned a lot in our almost 6 years of marriage but I know there are those who have much to teach and that we have much to learn. My friend Ailie (www.p3alive.com) shared these thoughts with me:

Many a husband carries the weight of the world on their shoulders. Coming home to a family that is safe, peaceful, and accepting creates a safety net for your husband. A place where he can be himself. A place for him to relax and rest. It refreshes his soul and spurs him on to greater heights

I used to think that creating a place of safety for my husband involved a house that was sparkling clean. Over the years I have realized that while a clean house helps with stress, my husband needed something deeper from me. Here are my three tips to creating a safe place for your beloved:

1. Understanding – Often my husband needs me to be understanding of where he is at. Sometimes our husbands come home processing deadlines, meetings, and other stressors. In that moment, I find myself being prodded by the Lord to be understanding of where my man is at before I ramble my five thousand words for the day.

2. Loads of fun – Fun for a man can be food for his soul. It counters the stress they are under from the day. It transforms them into laughing, smiling men. Laugh at his jokes, smile at him when you get the chance, flirt with him (even in front of your kids).

3. Respect and affirmation – Find ways to affirm your husband and show him how much you respect and appreciate the man that he is. This may be in love letters on his pillow, his study, or in his car. Respect to a man is as important as love is to a woman. Speak proudly of him everywhere you go. Accept his flaws and choose to see past them. See the man that God has made him to be. Show him his value and his worth.

The enemy does not want your marriage to succeed. Sadly, the world is not cheering you on my either. Everywhere you look there are tv shows and images that do not promote a healthy and Godly marriage. Another way you can protect your relationship is by setting up filters. I believe in CovenantEyes as a way to easily do this for you and your family. I believe in it so much that I am willing to be an affiliate for them and share this link with you. I believe anything that aims to keep pure things in front of our eyes will help our marriages.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

Wanting to “affair proof” our marriages might seem a bit extreme to some. However, if we are going to be extreme about anything shouldn’t it be our marriage/family?

10 encouraging Bible verses for your marriage. |Stacy Hudson|Better Than Newlyweds

April 24, 2013 by Mrs. Hudson

What do you do when you have an argument? Or when you get hurt? Do you shut down or talk with you spouse? Do you turn to the Bible? Having a list of Bible verses for your marriage on hand will help you stand on His promises. The Bible has a lot to say about the topic of marriage. In times of struggle or dispute between a husband and a wife it is helpful to seek Bible verses for your marriage.

Here are 10 encouraging Bible verses for your marriage:

#1 Genesis 2:18 (New International Version)

¹⁸ The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

#2 Ephesians 4:2-3 (New International Version)

²Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. ³Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

#3 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 (New International Version)

Do Not Be Yoked With Unbelievers ¹⁴Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?¹⁵What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?

#4 Proverbs 17:14 (New International Version)

¹⁴ Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam;
so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.

#5 1 Peter 3:1-6 (New International Version)

1 Peter 3Wives and Husbands ¹Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives,²when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. ³Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. ⁴Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. ⁵For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, ⁶like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

#6 Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (New International Version)

⁹ Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their work:

¹⁰ If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up!

¹¹ Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?

¹² Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

#7 Philippians 2:2 (New International Version)

²then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.

#8 Proverbs 5:18-19 (New International Version)

¹⁸ May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.

¹⁹ A loving doe, a graceful deer'”
may her breasts satisfy you always,
may you ever be captivated by her love.

#9 Proverbs 19:14 (New International Version)

¹⁴ Houses and wealth are inherited from parents,
but a prudent wife is from the LORD.

#10 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (New International Version)

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

When you seek guidance in your marriage from God his holy word will make your marriage far better than you attempting to guide your own marriage!

It is important to stay in the word and know God’s truth about marriage. Print out this list of Bible verses for your marriage and put it somewhere you will see it daily! Praying Bible verses for your marriage is powerful and God’s word does not return void.

Learn how to better your marriage today! Click Here!

When things don’t go according to plan I get uncomfortable.

What do you do when things don’t go according to plan? What do you hope your reaction would be if plans changed? Share below with us about how God showed up when things didn’t go according to plan! According to your plan anyways! 😀 Thanks for reading!

Here are 10 encouraging Bible verses for your marriage:

AFFILIATE DISCLOSURE