If you have ever thought “My Husband Doesn’t Listen to Me” you are not alone. I think every wife feels this way at some point. I do not think that every husband intends to make his wife feel this way. Most of them do not know how to listen well. And most of us do not know how to talk in a way that can help them listen well. Learning to communicate effectively in marriage can be a game changer.
How to help them listen well
- Be sure you have their attention before you start talking a mile a minute about your day
- Ask them if it is a good time to chat with them without distractions
- Do your best to not jump around from topic to topic … even though our brains are full of interconnected wires…their brains operate more like opening one box at a time.
If you have been married for any length of time you have probably figured out that communication in marriage is not always easy. In fact, most of the time it is difficult. Men and women do NOT communicate the same way. This often leads the wife to think “my husband doesn’t listen to me” while the husband thinks nothing is wrong. He thinks nothing is wrong because we often choose to huff about or silently fester our hurt. That doesn’t solve anything and it ends up hurting the marriage.
If you need to tell someone “I feel like my husband doesn’t listen to me” … tell your husband! Go to him first instead of your best friend, your mom, or your sister. Your husband Loves you and if he knows that you do not feel like he listens to you he will probably ask how he can fix it. Men are fixers right? They want to find a solution. Just in case that happens have the answers to the questions below ready.
- Why it is important for you that he gives you undivided attention?
- What does it make you feel when he doesn’t give you attention when you are speaking?
- What does him listening look like to you?
When you think “my husband doesn’t listen to me” turn to the Bible.
It is important that we go to God’s word first over any google search or book. Listening in marriage is important but Loving even if you don’t feel listened to is more important. This yields your heart to God and softens it towards your spouse. Keep these verses in mind the next time you think “my husband doesn’t listen to me.”
“Spouting off before listening to the facts is both shameful and foolish.” Proverbs 18:13
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. James 1:19
If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.Matthew 18:15
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. Proverbs 15:1
If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails 1 Corinthians 13:1-8